How Putting Up A Christmas Tree Is Like Writing A Novel

  1. You'll start off trying to follow the instructions, and then give up.
  2. Are you watching football, or you..?
  3. Keep pulling left and right long enough, and it will start to look like something.
  4. Remember the ornaments you hang on it will cover up the gaps.
  5. OOH LIGHTS PRETTY. 
  6. There's more of it on the floor.
  7. You cap it off with something over the top, or subtle and understated.  It ices the overall effect, or completely undoes it.
  8. At the end, your arms and hands hurt.
  9. You always find one you like better at someone else's house.
  10. Next year you swear you'll get a real one.

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